Zork Grand Inquisitor (walkthrough)

Warning: The following contains information that will help you solve the game. Please, DO NOT READ FROM START TO FINISH. You'll ruin the game for yourself and be doomed to eternal suffering. Is that worth it? Well, even so, don't say we didn't warn you...

Port Foozle

When the game starts you are standing at a crossroads. To the left is Port Foozle, to the right is an old well, and behind you is the path to the Monastery (now the Inquisition Headquarters). Head toward Port Foozle. At the fish shop on the edge of town look at the controls near the loudspeaker. Turn the volume on the Inquisition loudspeaker to maximum. Look at the display case in front of the store. While the speaker is spouting propaganda grab the stuff in the display case (Light Mead and a plastic six-pack holder).

Turn around and go to the dock. Use the winch a few times to hear everything the magic fish has to say. Place the six-pack holder on the hook and use the winch again. After the fish leaves get the Lantern from the Box.

Go to Antharia Jack's shop and show him the lantern (Use the lantern with the door). After he lets you in he'll offer you a cigar and go looking for his wrench. Take a cigar from the box. Jack will fiddle with the lantern (and hit it a few times) then send you back outside, keeping the lantern for himself.

Go to the end of the street. Look at the Talking Grand Inquisitor doll and light it with the cigar. Turn around and jump inside the barrel. After Jack gets hauled away by the Inquisition Police return to his shop and pick up the lantern. While in the shop you can also find a computer that is running Planetfall (Although you can't play).

After getting the lantern leave Port Foozle and head to the Monastery. Read the signs on the fence and get the rope from the Frobozz Electric Totemization Counter.

Now go to the well in the forest, use the rope to climb down the well. After meeting Dalboz (who's trapped in the lamp) and talking to Gael the Enchantress you will have your spellbook and be standing outside one of the secret entrances to the Great Underground Empire.

The Secret Entrance and the Crossroads

Look around and find the bucket. Inside is the Subway Token. After picking it up, cast REZROV on the door and proceed down the stairs.

Turn to the left. Next to the entrance is a small case that contains a hammer, a Sword, and a map. Open the case and take the hammer, then close it and use the hammer to break the glass. You can now get the Sword and Map from the case.

Look on the ground to the right of the entrance. You will find Griff's Totem there -- pick it up.

Proceed down the path to the crossroads. To the left is the entrance to the Dungeon Masters Lair (currently blocked by brush). To the right is the Crossroads teleport machine and entrance to the subway. Straight ahead takes you to the entrance to GUE Tech.

Dungeon Master's Lair

Head to the left to the entrance to the Dungeon Master's Lair. Use the sword to cut away the brush, then enter the doorway. Open the shed just to the left of the entrance and get the shovel and the THROCK spell. Head back to the crossroads and then go to the entrance to GUE tech.

GUE Tech

Open the door with the REZROV spell, then enter. To get into GUE Tech you have to solve the matching puzzles on the three columns. On the first two columns you have to match the pictures. The first column the correct picture is a volcano with a river of lava. The correct picture on the second is the tower with the "Z" on top. For the third column you have to create a complete window. Match the sections so that the entire window is visible, ignoring the rest of the image. Click on the window that appears to enter GUE Tech.

Move around the fountain to the left and read all the notices on the bulletin board. Continue around the fountain to the hallway entrance. Look up above the hallway entrance to see the sign describing it as an "Infinite Hallway". Cast IGRAM on the word "Infinite" to change the hallway to a finite corridor. Enter quickly before it changes back and go down the hallway and listen to all four parts of the message from Belboz.

Head back to the fountain and exit GUE Tech using the door. Turn around and go back up the stairs. The teleport station for GUE tech is to the left. To the right is a pile of dirt. Use the shovel to dig up the KENDALL spell, then use the teleport station to return to the Crossroads.

The Subway

Use the token to enter the GUE Subway system. Read the poster, then look at the directions on the wall. Cast KENDALL on the instructions to make them less confusing. Press the Hades button, turn around and step onto the platform.

Hades

The skeleton sitting on the bench has two books - read both, then get the Old Scratch card from his hand. Save the game. Play the scratch game (examine the card) until you win - restore you game if you lose. After you win the cash head through the doorway and use the teleport station to return to GUE Tech.

GUE Tech

Go back inside the GUE Tech building by going down the steps and entering the Window on the pillar. Head for the snack machines and use the change machine to get Zorkmid coins in exchange for the 500 Zorkmid bill you won. Buy an ice cream sandwich - the wrapper is the OBIDIL scroll, although it can't be used yet.

Use a Zorkmid to purchase Zork Rocks (#8) in the candy machine. The candy gets stuck inside the machine. Plug the vacuum into the candy machine and turn it on, then retrieve the candy from inside the vacuum.

Save the game again. Place the Zork Rocks in the soda machine and buy Classic Blam. Now hurry down the hallway to the lockers before the Zork Rocks explode. Slip them the second locker on the middle row and wait for it to explode. The locker is now open, and you can pick up the Dungeon Master's student ID inside.

Purchasing the matching candy in the machine to open all the other lockers - you must purchase the candy, then come down to the lockers. The only other locker you have to open is the third one on the bottom row (the one with all the graffiti). Head back to the candy machine and buy the candy that matches that locker (number 11). Return to the lockers and get the ProZork sedative from the locker and read all the books. Use the KENDALL spell to make the spell creation textbook easier to understand. After reading textbook turn around and use the ID Card to open the door to the Spell Lab.

Enter the Spell Lab and use the teleport station to the right and return to the crossroads.

Flood Control Dam #3

Take to subway to Flood Control Dam #3 (You no longer need a token to enter the subway). Turn to the left and use a Zorkmid in the machine to get a souvenir letter opener. Look at the drainpipe and Use THROCK on the Moss of Mareilon to make it grow, then pick it up.

Head to the dam control area and read the books. You will find the GOLGATEM spell.

Use the REZROV spell and the dam controls to close all four gates. The dam will be destroyed and power to Port Foozle will be interrupted.

Take the subway back to the crossroads and head back to the spell lab using the teleport system.

The Spell Lab

Use the sword to cut the ropes of the bridge, sending the invisible six-armed guy to the bottom of the canyon. Cast GOLGATEM to build a new bridge.

Head to the Spell Checker and run the OBIDIL spell through it to make it useable. Get a blank scroll form the box near the bridge, and then follow the instruction from the textbook you found in the lockers to create the BEBURTT spell. Entered the blank scroll into the machines in the spell lab in exactly this order: Origination, Modification, Replication, Interpretation, Transmogrification and finally the Spell Checker.

Use the teleport station to return to the Crossroads.

The Crossroads

Head to the umbrella plant. Casting IGRAM on the blossoms to reveal a scroll inside one of them, then cast BEBURTT. The blossoms will open and drop the ZIMDOR scroll. Pick it up and head back to the Dungeon Master's Lair.

The Dungeon Master’s Lair

Walk toward the house until you get to the snapdragon. Give the sedative to the snapdragon and use the sword to cut it loose. Head to the house and place the cigar in the ashtray on the left and pour the Light Mead into the basin on the right. Use the ZIMDOR scroll you got from the umbrella plant to increase the amount of Mead in the basin. Now that the alarm is disabled you can enter the house.

Inside the house get the Flatheadia Fudge, the jar of hotbugs and the Hungus Lard from the shelves to the left. Get the mug from the rack near the food processor. Read all the books you can find (three on the shelves to the left, one in the corner by the door, and two more on the shelves to the right. Listen to all the messages on the answering machine. Save the game again.

Head back outside and place the lard in the beehive to scare away the Quelbees. Quickly remove the lard and then use the sword on the hive. Pick up the honeycomb.

Walk around the side of the house to find the teleport station. Turn toward the house and look under the window. You will find a small mushroom-shaped plant. Cast THROCK on the plant and then place the snapdragon on top. Hit the plant with the hammer - the snapdragon will jump to the windowsill and fetch a torn piece of the SNAVIG scroll. .

Walk back around the house and go inside. Open the blinds and look at the walking castle. Use OBIDIL to attract him closer and go inside. Pick up the NARWILE spell from the castle's heart and go back into the house.

Place the Moss of Mareilon, mug, Hungus Lard, Flatheadia Fudge, Quelbee Honeycomb and the jar of hotbugs in the food processor. You will get a mug of hot chocolate and the YASTARD spell. Take the mug and the jar of hotbugs.

Now go into the next room. Grab the other piece of the SNAVIG scroll from the windowsill, then walk through the mirror. Assemble the pieces of the scroll and walk back though the mirror.

Open the wardrobe to reveal a time tunnel. Cast NARWILE on the tunnel, then use YASTARD on Griff's totem to send him through the tunnel.

The White House (Griff)

Behind the house lays the GOFLE spell. Pick it up and then open the mailbox to reveal an envelope addressed to Hell. Put the scroll inside the envelope and place the envelope in the mailbox. Close the mailbox and put the flag up. Head to the time tunnel on and return to the present.

Hades

Use the teleport station to go to Hades. Go through the doorway and pick up the phone. You now need to decode the automated message system to get Charon to show up. This puzzle can be difficult, but carefully listening to everything that is said will get you through it.

When Charon arrives pay him two Zorkmids and he will take you to hell. Open the mailbox there and get the envelope with the GLORF spell.

Pay Charon 2 Zorkmids to take you back across the river, then use the teleport station to return to the Spell Lab.

Spell Lab

Run the SNAVIG scroll through the spell checker to repair it. You should now have a full book of spells. Teleport back to the Crossroads.

Go to the secret entrance and use GLORF on the rope and take it. Head back to the subway and take it to the Monastery.

The Monastery

Tie the rope to the sword and throw it up to the grate in the ceiling. Climb up the rope.

Inside the Monastery is the Totemization device. You should save the game at this point. Look at the controls and turn the wheel with the light on it to disable the "PermaSeal" step. Change the destination to the Inquisition chamber, then move to the entrance to the machine and pull the lever.

After you land in the inquisition chamber pick up Lucy's totem from the box. Look at all the displays, then exit the monastery. Read all the signs on this side of the fence, then open the message sender near the door. Remove the middle hammer to change the message being sent to the guards, and then go back inside.

Go to the display on sealing up the time tunnels. Move the lever to set the speed of the display to the fastest setting and turn it on. After the hammer in the display breaks replace it with the one you took from the message system. Activate the display again and the planks over the time tunnel are destroyed.

Casting NARWILE on the tunnel, then send Lucy through it with the YASTARD spell.

Port Foozle (Lucy)

Go into Jack's bar and head to the math game. Take all the cards, then use the "four" card with the fly buzzing around near the door to make it a "five" card. Using the modified card solve the math problem in the machine. You will be ushered into the back room to play strip Grue, Fire, and Water with Jack.

Click on Jack before each round to read his mind, then select to correct button to defeat him. Eventually he will give you the Cube of Foundation and the walking castle will show up. Place the cube on one of the cushions then exit the castle through the time tunnel.

Hades

Head for Hades, either by going back down to the subway, or setting the destination of the Totemizer and going through it again. Once you're across the river again cast SNAVIG on Charon, then go to the guard near the gates of Hell. He'll let you take Charon's timecard, punch him out, then go through the gates of Hell.

Pick up Brog's totem from the floor and move on to the Time Tunnel. Cast NARWILE on the tunnel, then send Griff through with the YASTARD spell.

The Dragon (Griff)

Turn to the left until you find an "island" Griff can fly to. Push the claw, which will cause the sleeping dragon to shift, revealing more places you can go. Find the box in the ship wreckage and get the inflatable raft and man. On the dragon's hand to the left of the wreckage is a skeleton holding an air pump. Fly to the dragon's shout and place the raft and inflatable man in his nostrils. Use the pump to inflate both. You can now enter the dragon's mouth. Save the game before you go inside.

Once inside take the gold tooth and the Coconut of Quendor. Talk to the guy inside the dragon until he throws you a rope. Ignore his requests for help and place the Coconut inside the raft. Go out side and tie the rope to the raft and inflatable man. Head back inside the dragon's mouth again and use the gold tooth to pop the inflatable man. After popping him you need to exit the dragon's mouth very quickly. Find the raft and collect the Coconut.

When the castle appears go inside and place the Coconut on the cushion, then go through the time tunnel.

Hades

Charon won't take you back across the river because you've gone through the gates of Hell. Cast SNAVIG on the two-headed guard then go to Charon. He'll take you across the river. Use the teleport to go to the Dungeon Master Lair. Go inside the house and head back to the time tunnel in the wardrobe. Use YASTARD to send Brog through the tunnel.

The White House (Brog)

Go to the cave entrance and take both torches. Go back to the White House and rip the boards off the door. Once inside head downstairs and collect the Grue eggs. Go back upstairs and use the Flickering Torch with the pot in the corner, then place each egg in the pot to boil it.

Once you have boiled all the eggs go back downstairs. Throw the eggs at the stalactites until the break away and reveal a platform you can jump to. Jump across the chasm to the Chess puzzle and the Skull of Yorick.

There's no way for Brog to win the game, just use the board you pulled from the door to smash the game and pick up the Skull. Place the skull on the cushion in the castle and exit through the time tunnel.

Jail

Once Brog returns you will be arrested and thrown in jail. Talk to Jack through the air vent until he gives you a scroll. Use the letter opener to unscrew the vent and take the scroll. Take the poster off the wall. Use the scroll on the cell door to create a lock. Place the poster under the door and push the key out of the lock using the letter opener. Take the key and poster and unlock the door. Save the game.

Go to the control panel to the left of the cell and examine the blueprints. Watch the monitor until you see jack waving through his cell window. Using the blueprints and the camera number that displayed when you saw Jack figure out what cell he's in. Set the controls to that cell number and press the button. Jack will go get your stuff and come meet you at the control panel. The walking castle will appear again and take you to Flathead Mesa.

Flathead Mesa

Once Gael has given you the scroll use it on your spellbook to reverse all your spells. Go back into the castle and take all three artifacts. Exit the castle.

Head toward the broadcast tower. Use the VORZER spell to close the guard tent, then use MARGI to reveal the invisible fence. Unplug the fence, and then cut it with the sword. You now need to place the artifacts in the correct positions on the tower. The Skull goes in a box at the bottom of the tower, the Cube goes in the hole halfway up the tower, and the Coconut goes in one of the cups at the top of the tower. After you place the Coconut Dalboz will have you balance the cups using the lantern.

After placing all the items look up and cut the wire using the sword. Once the Grand Inquisitor starts climbing the tower cast the spell to bind the parts of magic.

The Inquisitor will be destroyed, the creatures trapped in totems will all be freed, Lucy will be elected Queen, and you will become the fourth Dungeon Master.

Congratulations. You've successfully completed Zork: Grand Inquisitor.